4 men - a Marathi, Bengali, Gujrati and our Santa were being interviewed for a top job. With nothing to choose between them, the President told them over dinner that the decisive test would be carried out the following morning, with each candidate being asked the same question and the best answer would get them the job.

The next morning, first up was the Marathi. "Here's your question," said the President, "What's the fastest thing in the world?" Without hesitation, he replied "A thought, because it takes no time at all." "Very good answer," said the President.

Next up was the Gujrati, "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president. "A blink," replied the Gujju almost instantaneously, "cos you don't think about a blink. It's a reflex." "Good answer," replied the president.

Next was the Bengali, "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president. The Bengali thought for a moment, "Electricity, because you can flip a switch and 20 miles away a light will go on immediately." "That's a great answer," replied the president.

Finally, it was our Santa's turn. "What`s the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president. Scratching his head Santa replied: "Diarrhoea, because last night after dinner I was lying on my bed when I got these awful stomach pains and before I could think, blink or turn on the light....."

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