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Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 15

1. A friend was visiting Mulla Nasrudin. "My boy has just written me from jail," he said. "He says
they're going to cut six months off his sentence for good behaviour." "MY," said Mulla Nasrudin.
"YOU MUST BE PROUD TO HAVE A SON LIKE THAT."


2. Mulla Nasrudin walked into a psychiatrist's office, opened a tobacco pouch, and stuffed his nose
with tobacco. "Man, I can see that you need me," the psychiatrist said. "Come on in and tell me
your problem." "MY ONLY PROBLEM IS," said Nasrudin, "I NEED A LIGHT."


3. Mulla Nasrudin climbed into a barber's chair and asked, "Where's the barber who used to work
on the next chair?" "Oh, that was a sad case," the barber said. "He became so nervous and
despondent over poor business, that one day when a customer said he didn't want a massage,
he went out of his mind and cut the customer's throat with a razor. He is now in the state
mental hospital. By the way, would you like a massage, Sir?" "ABSOLUTELY!" said Mulla
Nasrudin.


4. Mulla Nasrudin told his psychiatrist that he had the same nightmare over and over again, night
after night. "And what do you dream about?" asked the doctor. "I dream that I am married,"
said the Mulla. "And to whom are you married in this dream?" the doctor wanted to know. "TO
MY WIFE," said Nasrudin. "THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT A NIGHTMARE, SIR."


5. Mulla Nasrudin was on his first ocean voyage and was deathly ill. Trying to comfort him, the
steward said, "Don't be so down-hearted, Sir, I have never heard of anyone dying of seasickness."
"OH, DON'T TELL ME THAT," moaned Nasrudin. "IT HAS ONLY BEEN THE HOPE OF
DYING THAT HAS KEPT ME ALIVE."



6. Mulla Nasrudin and one of his friends were thinking one day to join the army. "What makes you
think to join the army?" asked the Mulla. "Well, I don't have a wife and I love war," said the
friend. "And why you are thinking to join it?" "ME?" said Nasrudin. "I HAVE A WIFE AND I LOVE
PEACE."



7. Late one night a psychiatrist found himself staring into the muzzle of a large pistol. He was
shocked to recognize the gunman who was holding him up. "See here, Nasrudin," he said.
"Don't you remember me? I am your benefactor. Don't you remember the time I saved you
from the electric chair by proving you were crazy?"

Mulla Nasrudin laughed and laughed and laughed. "SURE I REMEMBER YOU, SIR. BUT, AIN'T ROBBING YOUR BENEFACTOR A CRAZY
THING TO DO?"


8. "Young man," said the angry father, Mulla Nasrudin, "didn't I hear the clock strike four when
you brought my daughter home?" "Yes, Sir," said the boy. "It was going to strike ten, but I
grabbed the gong and held it so it wouldn't disturb you." "I WILL BE A SO-AND-SO," said
Nasrudin. "WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT IN MY YOUNGER DAYS?"


9. Mulla Nasrudin was coming to after a serious operation. He was just conscious enough to feel
the softness of the comfortable bed and the warmth of gentle hands on his forehead. "Where
am I?" he asked. "In Heaven?" "NO," said his wife, "I AM STILL RIGHT HERE WITH YOU."



10. A man was chatting to Mulla Nasrudin who was a rabid fisherman. "I notice," he said, "that
when you tell about the fish you caught you vary the size of it for different listeners." "YES,"
replied Nasrudin, "I NEVER TELL A MAN MORE THAN I THINK HE WILL BELIEVE."


Read more: Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 15

Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 14

1. "You ought to stand on your two feet and show your wife who is running things at your house,"
a big, bossy fellow said to his friend, Mulla Nasrudin. "THERE IS NO NEED TO," said Nasrudin,
"SHE ALREADY KNOWS."



2. The stranger was talking in the tavern. "For fifteen years," he said, "my habits were as regular
as clockwork. I rose exactly at six. Half an hour later I was at breakfast. At seven I was at
work. I had lunch at one, and supper at six, and was in bed at nine-thirty. I ate only plain food,
and didn't have a day of sickness during all those years." "MY," said Mulla Nasrudin who was
listening to the story, "AND WHAT WERE YOU IN JAIL FOR?"


3. Mulla Nasrudin had been arrested for stealing a hog. The trial was short and sweet. There was
no concrete evidence against the Mulla and the judge dismissed the case against him. But for
some reason the Mulla seemed not to understand. "The case is dismissed," the judge said, "It is
over. You are acquitted. You can go." "WELL, THANKS, JUDGE," said Nasrudin. "BUT DO I HAVE
TO GIVE HIM BACK HIS HOG?"



4.Mulla Nasrudin kept begging the noted pianist to play. "Well, all right, since you insist," he said.
"What shall I play?" "ANYTHING YOU LIKE," said Nasrudin. "IT'S ONLY TO ANNOY THE
NEIGHBOURS."



5. Mulla Nasrudin's wife used to give the Mulla a regular inspection every night when he came
home. Every hair she discovered on his coat would be cause for a terrible scene. One evening,
when she didn't find a single hair, she screamed at him, "NOW YOU ARE EVEN RUNNING AFTER
BALD-HEADED WOMEN."


6. Mulla Nasrudin was introduced as the man who had just made $800,000 in an oil deal in
Oklahoma. In response, the Mulla said, "IT WAS NOT AN OIL DEAL, IT WAS A REAL ESTATE
DEAL. IT WAS NOT IN OKLAHOMA, BUT IN VIRGINIA. I AM SORRY, BUT THE MAN HAD HIS
FIGURES MIXED UP. IT WAS NOT $800,000, BUT $800. AND BESIDES THAT, IT WAS NOT A
PROFIT, BUT A LOSS. AND, IN THE END, IF YOU DON'T MIND, LET ME TELL YOU, THAT I AM
NOT THE MAN CONCERNED, SIR."


7. Mulla Nasrudin, the landlord of a rather rundown rooming house, had led a prospective tenant
to a third-floor room with badly spotted wall paper. Nasrudin: "The last man who lived in this
room was an inventor he invented some sort of explosive." Prospect: "Oh, these spots on the
walls are chemicals?" Nasrudin: "NO, THE INVENTOR."


8. Mulla Nasrudin was called in the election bribery case. "You say," asked the judge, "that you
were given $10 to vote for the Democrats, and you got another $10 to vote for the
republicans?" "Yes, Sir, Your Honour," said the Mulla. "And how did you vote?" asked the judge.
"YOUR HONOUR," said Nasrudin, "I VOTED ACCORDING TO MY CONSCIENCE."



9. Mulla Nasrudin's wife was upset and was confiding in her maid. "Do you know," she said, "I
suspect my husband is having an affair with the cook." "OH," cried the maid. "YOU CAN'T
BELIEVE THAT. YOU ARE JUST SAYING THAT TO MAKE ME JEALOUS."



10. "You sure do look downhearted, Mulla? What's the matter?" asked a friend. "It's my future that
worries me," said Nasrudin. "What makes your future so black?" the friend asked. "MY PAST,"
replied Nasrudin.


Read more: Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 14

Mulla Nasruddin and the Moving Friend

"Nasruddin," a friend said one day, "I am moving to another village. Can I have your ring, so that I will remember you every time I look at it?"

Nasruddin replied, "Well, you might lose the ring and then forget about me. How about I don€™t give you a ring in the first place that way, every time that you look at your finger and don€™t see a ring, you will definitely remember me."


More Mulla Nasruddin Jokes
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More Sardar Jokes

Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 13

1. A college freshman was talking about girls with Mulla Nasrudin. "Which would you advise me to
do? Marry a sensible girl or a beautiful girl, Mulla?" he asked. "I don't think you will be able to
marry either," said the Mulla. "Why not?" asked the freshman. "IT'S LOGICAL," said Nasrudin.
"A BEAUTIFUL GIRL COULD DO BETTER AND A SENSIBLE! GIRL WOULD KNOW BETTER."



2. "What are you doing hiding under the bed?" asked Mulla Nasrudin's wife. "It's all lightening and
thunder," said the Mulla. "And I don't want to get struck by lightening. "Oh, that's silly," said
his wife. "If lightening is going to strike you, it will strike you no matter where you are."
"THAT'S ALL RIGHT," said Nasrudin. "BUT, IF IT IS GOING TO STRIKE ME, I JUST WANT TO BE
HARD TO FIND."


3. Mulla Nasrudin and one of his friends were sitting under the bridge listening to the holiday
traffic passing overhead. "I hate holidays," said the friend. "YES, " said Nasrudin, "IT MAKES
YOU FEEL RIGHT COMMON WHEN NOBODY AIN'T WORKING. "


4. "This book," said the salesman, "will do half your work." "FINE," said Mulla Nasrudin. "I WILL
TAKE TWO OF THEM."


5. Mulla Nasrudin used to say: "IF YOU WANT YOUR WIFE TO PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO WHAT
YOU ARE SAYING, WHISPER IT TO ANOTHER WOMAN IN A LOW VOICE."



6. New neighbours had moved in and had been under observation for several days. "They seem
like a most devoted couple," said Mulla Nasrudin's wife to her husband. "Every time he leaves
for work she comes out on the porch and he hugs and kisses her. Why don't you do that?"
"ME?" said Nasrudin. "I SHOULD SAY NOT. I HAVE NOT EVEN BEEN INTRODUCED TO HER YET."


7. A policeman sped drunk Mulla Nasrudin and said to him, "Do you know who I am?" "I CAN'T
SAY THAT I DO," said Nasrudin, "BUT IF YOU WILL TELL ME WHERE YOU LIVE, I WILL HELP
YOU HOME."


8. The young man had kissed his girlfriend, Mulla Nasrudin's daughter, goodnight about a dozen
times. They just could not seem to say goodnight. Finally he said, "Love is wonderful. Darling,
do we really have to say goodnight?" Mulla Nasrudin's voice came from deep within the house,
"CERTAINLY NOT. STICK AROUND ANOTHER HALF HOUR AND YOU CAN SAY GOOD MORNING."


9. The two burglars worked as a team. One stayed outside as a lookout, while the other robbed
the house. One night, when the inside man returned, his buddy said, "How much did you get?"
"Nothing," the other said. "This is the house of Mulla Nasrudin." "GEE!" said his buddy. "THEN
HOW MUCH DID YOU LOSE?"


10. It seemed that every time Mulla Nasrudin met his lawyer, he had some added legal fees. It
worried the Mulla to the point of ulcers. Then one day, he met his lawyer in the post office and
said, "NICE DAY, ISN'T IT? AND REMEMBER, I AM TELLING YOU, NOT ASKING YOU, SIR.

Read more: Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 13

Mulla Nasruddin Whom do you trust?

 A neighbour comes to the gate of Nasreddin Hoja's yard. The Hoja goes out to meet him outside.
"Would you mind, Hoja," the neighbour asks, "lending me your donkey today? I have some goods to transport to the next town."
The Hoja doesn't feel inclined to lend out the animal to that particular man, however;
so, not to seem rude, he answers: "I'm sorry, but I've already lent him to somebody else."

Suddenly the donkey can be heard braying loudly behind the wall of the yard.
"You lied to me, Hoja!" the neighbour exclaims. "There it is behind that wall!"

"What do you mean?" the Hoja replies indignantly. "Whom would you rather believe, a donkey or your Hoja?"


More Mulla Nasruddin Jokes
More Bollywood Jokes
More Indian Jokes
More Sardar Jokes

Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 12

1. A preacher was being entertained at dinner and the other guests were praising his sermon. One
of them turned to Mulla Nasrudin, who was at the talk, but had remained silent, and asked,
"Mulla, what did you think of the sermon?" "OH, IT WAS ALL RIGHT," said Nasrudin, "ONLY HE
PASSED UP THREE REAL GOOD PLACES WHERE HE COULD HAVE SPED."



2. Mulla Nasrudin's wife complained bitterly to the Mulla. "I am absolutely ashamed of the way we
live. Mother pays our rent. My aunt buys our clothes. My sister sends us money for food. I don't
like to complain, but I am ashamed that we cannot do better than that." "YOU SHOULD BE
ASHAMED," said Nasrudin. "YOU HAVE GOT TWO UNCLES THAT DON'T SEND US A DIME."



3. A man in the upstairs apartment yelled to Mulla Nasrudin downstairs, "If you don't s playing
that clarinet, I will go crazy." "TOO LATE NOW," said Nasrudin. "I SPED AN HOUR AGO,
SIR."


4. The preacher was visiting Mulla Nasrudin in the hospital, who had been injured in a fight. "I am
going to pray so you will forgive your enemy for hitting you with a brick," the preacher said. "IT
MIGHT BE BETTER," said Nasrudin, "IF YOU WAITED UNTIL I GET OUT OF HERE AND THEN
PRAY FOR THE OTHER FELLOW, SIR."


5. The wife of Mulla Nasrudin had received a beautiful skunk coat for her birthday a gift from her
husband. "Why," she said with excitement,"I just can't understand how a beautiful coat like
that could possibly come from such a miserable evil-smelling little beast."

"WELL," said Nasrudin, "I DID NOT EXACTLY EXPECT ANY GRATITUDE FROM YOU, BUT I DO THINK I
DESERVE A LITTLE BIT MORE RESPECT."


6. A vacuum cleaner salesman rang the doorbell of Mulla Nasrudin's house and was admitted by a
woman, who immediately left the room. After talking a bit to the Mulla who was in the room,
the salesman said, "Was that your wife, Sir, who let me in?" "CERTAINLY. DO YOU THINK I
WOULD HIRE A MAID AS HOMELY AS THAT?" asked Nasrudin.


7. The drunk Mulla Nasrudin approached the policeman on the corner and said, "Pardon me,
Officer, but where am I?" "You are on the corner of Main and Forth," the policeman said.
"NEVER MIND THE DETAILS," said Nasrudin. "WHAT TOWN AM I IN?"



8. "Everybody has something to be thankful for," the minister said to Mulla Nasrudin, who was
sitting in his office telling a tale of woe. "Look at the man across the street from you who just
lost his wife in an automobile accident." "YES," said Nasrudin, "BUT EVERYBODY CAN'T BE THAT
LUCKY, SIR."



9. "This is a lesson in logic," said the old professor in the teahouse. "If the show starts at nine and
dinner is at six and my son has the measles, and brother drives a Cadillac, how old am I?" "You
are eighty-four," replied Mulla Nasrudin promptly.

"Right," said the professor. "Now tell the rest of the fellows here how you arrived at the correct answer." "IT'S EASY," said Nasrudin. "I HAVE
GOT AN UNCLE WHO IS FORTY-TWO AND HE IS ONLY HALF NUTS, SIR."


10. Mulla Nasrudin's son, home from college, was talking to his father about the "Law of
Compensation," which he had studied. "If a person loses one eye," he explained, "the sight in
the other becomes stronger.

If he loses the hearing in one ear, the hearing in the other becomes more acute. If he loses one hand, he becomes more agile with the other." "I GUESS THAT'S RIGHT," said Nasrudin. "I HAVE ALWAYS NOTICED THAT WHEN A MAN HAS ONE SHORT LEG THE OTHER IS LONGER."


Read more: Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 12