Mulla Nasruddin Short Jokes Collection - Part 19

1. A man went to the funeral of Mulla Nasrudin's wife. In the funeral home, the Mulla was standing
at the end of the casket. The man looked at his friend's dead wife and said, "Does she not look
wonderful!" "WHY NOT? " asked Nasrudin. "SHE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL ALL WINTER! "



2. Mulla Nasrudin was in an accident and sued the insurance company for $1,000 and won his
case. When he received his check; he called on his lawyer to settle up. "How much do I owe
you?" he asked the lawyer. "Well," said the lawyer, "I will tell you how it is. Since I am an old
friend of your's and your father before you, my fee will be only $900."

"I am sure glad," said Nasrudin as he made out his check for $900, "THAT YOU WERE NOT A FRIEND OF MY
GRANDFATHER'S TOO."



3. A school teacher wrote a note home to Abdul's mother: "Dear Mrs. Nasrudin, your son, Abdul,
is a smart boy, but he spends all of his time with the girls. I am trying to break him of this
habit." The teacher received this reply: "I wish you success. Please let me know how you do it.
I HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR YEARS TO BREAK HIS FATHER OF THE SAME HABIT."



4. Mulla Nasrudin's wife was in the hospital dying. Just before she passed away, she said to her
husband who was sitting by the bedside, "Darling, I have only one regret as I pass on. I hate to
leave you behind in all of your loneliness. I just want you to know that if you should ever want
to remarry, you have my consent. Only, if you do, I wonder if you would promise me
something."

"Yes, Darling," said the Mulla.'what is it?" "Would you promise not to let your new
wife wear my old clothes and remind you of me?" she asked. "WHY,CERTAINLY I WILL
PROMISE YOU THAT," said Nasrudin. "I WOULDN'T THINK OF DOING SUCH A THING. BESIDES,
ALL OF YOUR SUITS ARE TOO SMALL FOR FATIMA ANYWAY."


5. Mulla Nasrudin and his friend, Old Joe, went into a bar and Joe ordered four straight shots in
about four minutes. Each time he would gulp it down. After the fourth, and before he could
order the fifth, Joe passed out -- plunk, right on the floor. "WELL," said Nasrudin, "ONE THING
ABOUT OLD JOE -- HE KNOWS WHEN HE'S HAD ENOUGH."



6. Mulla Nasrudin and his neighbour were talking about the problems of raising their boys. "Is
your son very ambitious, Mulla?" asked the neighbour. "YES," said Nasrudin, "HE HAS SUCH
BIG IDEAS ABOUT BEING RICH AND SUCCESSFUL, THAT ALREADY HE'S BEGINNING TO LOOK
ON ME AS A SORT OF POOR RELATION."


7. A drunk sat next to old Mulla Nasrudin on a bus. Thinking Mulla Nasrudin to be a preacher from
his appearance and trying to start a conversation, he said, "I ain't going to heaven. There ain't
no heaven." The Mulla never said a word. "I say there ain't no heaven," said the drunk in a loud
voice. The Mulla still didn't answer him. "I said I ain't going to heaven," shouted the drunk.
Mulla Nasrudin quietly turned to the drunk and said, "WELL, GO TO HELL, THEN; BUT BE QUIET
ABOUT IT."



8. The old Mulla Nasrudin was complaining to his landlady about the lack of heat in his room.
"SOMETIMES IT GETS SO COLD AT NIGHT," he said, "THAT I WAKE UP AND HEAR MY TEETH
CHATTERING ON THE NIGHT TABLE."



9. Mulla Nasrudin bought one of those new hearing aids that are practically invisible. He was told
that he could return it if it didn't prove twice as good as the cumbersome device he had been
using. He sped by a few days later to express his satisfaction with the new device. "I will bet
your family likes it too," said the clerk.

"Oh, they don't even know I have got it," said Nasrudin. "AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT? I AM HAVING MORE FUN WITH IT! IN THE PAST TWO DAYS, I HAVE CHANGED MY WILL THREE TIMES."

10. "That pain in your leg is caused by old age," the doctor told Mulla Nasrudin. "That can't be,"
replied the Mulla. "THE OTHER LEG IS THE SAME AGE AND DOESN'T HURT A BIT."

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